My sweet husband just came in the living room looking all flushed and really like he had seen a ghost. He said that he had had his first real "episode" where he thought Saylor wasn't breathing. We had just came in from a day out and about with the all of us. Lunch, a little shopping and just enjoying one last day together before the girls go back to school. Bryan just put Saylor down because he had fallen asleep on the way home. I guess he went back in our room and when he looked down to check on him he looked like he was gone. At that moment when Bryan came in and told me what had happened, I felt such empathy for him. Because I know how he felt. He is usually comforting me....actually always comforting me. I could see that he was shaken up and I hugged him. We tried to laugh it off, like we always do.
My husband has been my rock in so many ways throughout all of this. I am so vocal with my grief and he is not. I have been selfish and have not always thought how this has affected him. He did bury his child too. I think that he has suffered so much silently like so many men and bereaved fathers do.
Bryan is not perfect. Neither of us are. He is always there for me and will always be. I know that in my heart. He takes care of our family and has taken care of me when I couldn't hardly take care of myself. He is truly my best friend and I am so thankful that he is the father of my four children.
1 comment:
Gosh I am sure that scared the crap out of him - it has not happened to my husband yet. I don't think my husband really understands in those moments you feel like you are re-living everything all over again!
So glad that you have a great husband that is supportive of you!
Post a Comment