Today is my 37th birthday. Last night I was texting my dad(he is in a rehabilitation hospital....broke both of his legs and fractured his shoulder). Anyway, he wished me a happy birthday and I asked him could he believe that he had a 37 year old daughter.(I am the oldest of six) He then said "You feeling old" or something like that. I replied, "Yes, I do or at least my soul does." "I miss my girl, Daddy." That pretty much sums up how I am feeling today on my birthday. I am thankful to celebrate another year. Thankful to be pretty healthy and very thankful for my other three children that bless my life each minute of each day. I do miss my baby so much though. I can't believe that I will never get to see her face again. At least not on this earth.
School is starting up again. It is always bittersweet to send my kids back to school and to new grades. They are getting older and growing up so fast. They are here with me though and I do get to experience all these wonderful milestones with them. I will never get to take Tess to her first day of kindergarten and it makes me so sad.
Tess never got to celebrate one of my birthdays. She never got to celebrate her own. Life is freaking hard and that is all there is to it. I hope she knows how much I love her. I would give anything just to hold her one more time. That would be the best birthday present ever.
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