Put In My Place

I had a very eye opening conversation with my husband and sister in law the other day. I was venting to them about another bereaved mother that I was aquaintances with on Facebook. I said something like," I am sorry, but this woman is such a downer. All she ever talks about is the death of her child. It totally consumes her life. I think I might have to unfriend her because she is too much." Bryan looked at me and said, " Are you kidding me?" " That was totally you like the whole last year." I looked at Jen and she said, " Yeah pretty much." We all kind of laughed that I was so clueless. I have really been thinking about this conversation for the last week or so. It made me realize how self-centered grief sometimes makes people. When I was in the middle of that awful despair, I really had a hard time caring about others or having a lot of empathy for people in general. I thought that what I was going through was the worst thing ever and no ones pain or hardships could ever compare. I realize now how selfish those type of feelings were. I know that I am healing everyday just from the sheer fact that I can even recognize this. It makes me very thankful for little steps to healing. I am also ashamed to have said those things about that mother. Who am I to judge how she grieves? How could I so soon forget those awful dark days that I experienced, where my daughters death consumed every waking moment of each and every day? Shame on me.